My Compass is Broken/Finding New Direction

I have always thought my life was well mapped out.  I knew what I wanted.  I knew how to go about achieving what I wanted and I was journeying on the path just as planned.   My compass was pointed in the right direction and all I needed to do, was stay the course.  Then the inevitable happens.   The uncomfortable groundlessness beneath my feet lets me know, without a doubt, that major life-changing events are happening that may have me changing course.  My compass is broken.

Change is never easy.   With every breath I take, a change occurs.   What makes it difficult is when I convince myself that I am not ready for the change.  Over the years, I formed a lot of ideas about what life is, oftentimes based on unrealistic hopes and standards.  I learned that what I thought life was supposed to be like, was not always the case.   I often found myself frustrated when reality set in and it fell short of my expectations.  

Never have expectations played a more significant role than in relationships with others.  In any healthy relationship there are certain expectations, like being treated well and being respected.   Those are realistic expectations.  But sometimes I have found myself in a relationship that did not mirror what I anticipated would happen.  At times like this I experience sadness, hurt, remorse or betrayal.   

Finding new direction, for me, means changing my perspective.  If I cannot change the circumstance, I need to change my perspective.    This means seeing the perfection in the relationship, just the way it is.        

With eyes full of clarity, I am capable of changing the relationships in my life by adjusting my point of view.

'When you are lost in the rain, search for a rainbow.".

Pushed

Pushed is what happens

Pushed is losing balance.

Pushed is stretching boundaries.

Pushed is searching. Pushed is falling.

Pushed preceded falling.  Falling is losing balance.

I am pushed